Half a glass

Today was emotionally, physically, and mentally exhausting, but then I found solace in knowing that I was spiritually content. Knowing who I am and having decided what I am living for makes life a little bit more livable.  Call me an optimist. I guess I'd rather be called a realist, though. I know who I am. I know things can be bad or good but really, things just are. And knowing the essence of a thing and the purpose of it helps understanding. What I am saying is that the glass isn't half full nor is it half empty; it is simply half a glass. Why make something negative or positive out of it? It just is.

Then I realized that this whole question of existence bothers me. Everyone's just trying to figure out the great philosophical question why are we here?  Why? I dunno. And nobody will ever know, so decide. Just decide what your life is for. I did, and I think its why I'm content and why things are alright with my soul.

I aim to end complacency.
I strive to pursue and uphold and admire beauty.
I long to love anyone who needs it.

And often, I fail at my aims, strivings and longings, but I know who I am and know there is hope.

The way I see it is that every moment is an adventure and an investment for more adventures. Each moment can be hard, but it's an investment. A moment can be dull, but an investment. Heck, things can be happy and lead to an adventure.

Just decide to live a life well lived and don't ever give up. If something sucks, make it not suck. Be cliche and be the change you want to see in the world.

End rant.

Pure of Heart

I was once told that I had a pure heart.

Granted, this was from a Nigerian man sitting in front of me on a plane to Ukraine after only a short discussion on my life and dreams.

And, certainly, I would love to say this is true about myself, but rather than pridefully (and hypocritically) claim it, I will set it as a goal.  His words inspired me to think about this idea of purity.

What is purity, especially that of the heart?

My Christian upbringing would tell me that it is an aversion to sexual sin and physical desires: a life unpolluted by worldly cravings.  But I think it is something much more than that.

First, (a small rabbit trail, here) I think sexuality is overdramatized by most of the population, regardless of religious beliefs.  Contrary to popular belief, sex is neither the epitome of evil nor the utmost goal that one can achieve.  It is simply a biological process that is, yes, very vital to our society and personal lives, but really should not be the only aspect of humanity that dictates that one is pure or has a pure heart.

Second, I think purity is something deeper: something we cannot fully understand or achieve.  And purity is not always white and clean.  Something can be pure gold or pure mud.  Pure alcohol, pure blood.

What then is a pure heart - a purity of the soul?  I think it is an individual trait.  Purity shows that someone is not in conflict: a trait that is certainly unattainable.  One cannot be purely good, purely beautiful, nor purely wise without conflict, because we are purely human, and humans have this annoying tendency to cause or live amidst conflict.

Philosophers will debate what it means to be fully human.  For me, I think we each must decide what it means to be purely human, and I have decided to pursue goodness, beauty, and wisdom.  If someone is as good enough to say that I have a pure heart, I might as well try to prove them right.

Perhaps such a decision or such a hope is what that Nigerian man saw in me.  I hope I live a life worthy of this gracious compliment.  One thing is for sure: the conflicts of the future will give me ample opportunity to practice.